Folks, your boy got a new gig. I have ascended from a Staff Accountant to a Staff Accountant who works dahntahn. If this appears to you as only a title change well then you must not know the differences in image, routine, and social status that this ascension brings along. While I do not intend in going into detail about the lavish life of PAT busses (the port authority has recently rebranded as the PRT (Pittsburgh Regional Transit (I added another set of parentheses because I live in excess))) and lunches downtown, I would like for everyone to know that I read the headlines now. Yes, a crucial step to becoming ingratiated into the working dahntahnian is reading the headlines. Reading as much as is necessary to be informed these days is a difficult task and so I feel I would be remiss if I didn’t pass my newfound knowledge on to the faithful readers of COS. Here is what you missed by not being an informed dahntanian.
More Classified Documents Found at President Biden’s Delaware Home
Starting off with politics? Given my measured, certainly unbiased approach to covering college football for COS, I feel that this is well within my wheel house. Joey B just can’t catch a break with this one. In the midst of what was a developing case against Former President Donald Trump for mishandling classified documents ole Joey got caught doing the same thing. What is shocking to me is that this is an issue. Check the wallets of any member of their generation and see how far back they keep receipts. Some of the greatest battles of mankind has ever seen has been between leather and accumulated receipt paper. Yes, they aren’t technically their receipts and likely shouldn’t have ever left the establishment (maybe establishing a customer copy and a merchant copy isn’t the worst idea) but at the end of the day its paper. Yawn, move on.
Cost of Eggs Up, Shortages Due to Bird Flu
Okay I am upset. Last year it was the price of wings and now its the eggs (inadvertently just solved the chicken v egg argument as I typed that one out). I would really like for there to be an emphasized effort to start protecting chickens. You need eggs for everything! Cooking, baking, even teaching aerodynamics to middle schoolers! I get that it has been troublesome to fight the economic fires that have resulted from the pandemic but I’d empty any of Pittsburgh’s four rivers to put this one aht.
Debt Ceiling Looms Over Capitol as Congress Returns to Work
Okay this is going to give away how much I actually know about this issue but diving into this really gave me a good laugh. Apparently if we can’t sort out this issue and can’t pay the bills then our credit will appear tarnished on the international stage. You are saying to me that if we can’t pay the bills now then a nation who carries 31 TRILLION dollars in debt is going to seem like a credit risk? Hmmmm. Interesting. On the other hand I look like a credit risk because I don’t have enough lines of credit. So maybe going further into debt isn’t a bad thing? Probably could get a good deal on miles with Capital One.
r/Pittsburgh post claims that a shipping container was spotted in flight over dahntahn this week
Lets end with some local flavor. This is not an official headline but according to a post on reddit to r/pittsburgh a citizen of shadyside expressed concern that they might have spotted a flying shipping container in the sky. Whether this is yet another Pittsburgh tech company partnering with Amazon to find creative ways to become more efficient or someone was really fed up with hauling crap through the tunnels, rest assured it wouldn’t be unwise to be on the lookout for more flying shipping containers traveling over your home.